IntoxiCation

2008-12-14T16:45:00.003+08:00

I have moved.

2008-12-14T14:53:00.000+08:00

I am bored.

I am watching Vetri Vizha now.

I am hungry.

I am god damn lazy to get my arse outta my house.

I find John Abraham hot+sexy.

I can go googoogaga over Jodi No 1 Michael.

I realise I've got the most fcuked up cousin.[Only referring to one though]

I have very ugly nails.

I miss my Nokia 5610.

I like venting my frustrations on people I love.

I realise forever is not really forever.

I will be seesha-ing next week.

I realise I have got almost noone left.

I think everything is fake.

Boo!

2008-12-14T13:36:00.000+08:00

I want to be like how I was 10 months back.

Not giving a hood about anything at all.

I realised, what I have lost in the 10 months is never going to return back.

But what is the point of regretting everything now?

I've lost everything because of you, and all I want now is you to vanish.

I am tearing as I am typing this.

How I wish I never knew you.

At this point of time, my life is full of regrets, all because of you.

Disappear once and for all, please.

2008-12-14T12:58:00.000+08:00

Good afternoon sunshines. Just a random picture taken on Friday when i was otw to my aunty house. Have a great day people. Boo!

2008-12-14T00:32:00.001+08:00

I have ran out of things to blog.

Nights people.

2008-12-13T23:36:00.001+08:00

Maybe we should remain as how we are now.

2008-12-13T18:36:00.000+08:00

I want the collon biscuit:(

2008-12-13T13:19:00.000+08:00

Had quite a weird dream yesterday.

I don't quite remember waht shit it was about.

I am still thinking about waht was it about.

Memories ~~never~~ return.

And she shrugs everything off her mind.

This very event.

As much as much this post affects you, as much as I am affected.

How I wish my mind can go blank this very minute.

As much as you want to give this up, as much as I want you to give up too.

How I wish you can make a decision soon.

The ten months we had, we went through a ride through an emotional rollercoaster.

We faced everything together, hurting each other badly.

Now we are at a point, where we shouldn't be hesitating to make a move.

Even if you deny, it's a known fact that everything has faded.

Touch your heart and say, are you really happy?

Think through everything again, and you will know the answer yourself.

2008-12-13T00:00:00.002+08:00

Contradictions speaks.

Perceptions changes.

Life is full of them right?

We can't survive if can't adapt to the changes.

Getting lost in my own train of thoughts again.

...

....

...

Nights again, people.

2008-12-12T23:36:00.000+08:00

I am tired, but very contented.
Nights people.

2008-12-11T23:16:00.001+08:00

Kandaen kandaen ethir kaalam naan kandaen.
Kondaen kondaen uyir kathal naan kondhaen.

Feeling uber hungry.
Darn, and I am plain lazy to go down right now.
Fcuk this shit alright.
I wanna force myself to sleep.
Nights people

2008-12-11T18:50:00.002+08:00

Hahahahah. My aunty and my mom. So oldies. hahhaahah

My first day at primary school=)

Just random pictures. Am feeling bored, to the extreme. Have been keeping my arse at home. Now I can't wait for tomorrow to come. Loves.

2008-12-11T17:32:00.000+08:00

Pictures taken yesterday. Went to Kelly service to return the Borders uniform. Headed to Vivo after that. Camwhored and headed back home.

2008-12-11T14:25:00.000+08:00

More pictures taken on tuesday. Seesha-ed with Shabir. Had lotsa problems on that particular day. Bladed my hand, due to the stress he was giving. Cancelled my plan with Nesha because of some stuffs. That is all fot tuesday's pictures. More pictures taken yesterday will be up in the next post=)

2008-12-11T02:11:00.001+08:00

Izah and her mummy.

Nashira with her "monkey see" pose. heheh

Sukainah:D

NABIL.
Him again=)

More pictures taken on Raya Haji. That's all for Haji Pictures. I have still got about 100 pictures to sort out taken in the past couple of days. 9th and 10th. Will do it soon. Nights. people=)

2008-12-11T01:47:00.000+08:00

Pictures taken last Suday when we went to West Coast Park. Sadly, pyramid was under maintainence. But still, that didn't dampen our mood to camwhore. Haha. Boos. More Pictures to be up=)

2008-12-10T22:45:00.001+08:00

Personal Fave.Us with our Borders tag.

After work.

The very first day at Expo. Setting up.

Pam in purple, and sunshine in Green. haha

Pictures taken during our worktime. Yeahh. More pictures to be up in the upcoming posts=)

2008-12-10T13:03:00.003+08:00

I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you! I miss you!

Please come back fast. Home seems very dead without you. I love you. Hope you are doing good there.

2008-12-10T01:29:00.002+08:00

A few pictures taken yesterday. Will blog more tonight oR perhaps, tomorrow. Nights people. Muackiiiez

2008-12-10T00:25:00.004+08:00

Happy birthday my dearest.

Finally you've turned 18 uh? When the year has like about 20 days for the year to end. Hahaha. Love you Bitch. Thanks for being there for me, whenever I needed you. Remember the times, when we hated each other? And the times we were practically more like a best friends kind of thing? Meritus times? The funness. I am glad I have gotten a friend like you and I thank god for that. I guess you are one of the few friends whom I really can talk to without hesitating about anything. And babe, stop crying for unnecessary things. I will be your girlfriend, if you want me to. Haha. Just remember this, RAMIZAH BANU BINTE ABDUL RAHMAN WAS THE FIRST TO WISH NESHA THIS YEAR. HAHA. I love you babe. See you soon. Happy clubbing this Friday. Too bad, I can't join. Have a blast on this special day of yours. Muackks

2008-12-09T17:26:00.001+08:00

*Cheers to the blog.
Won't be blogging here anymore.
Bye.

2008-12-09T14:18:00.003+08:00

And you were smiling away when i cut my hand.
Now I realise, the love you have for me.
Fake, it is.

And for your info, I am not another one.
I din cheat you with a guy like some sluts out there nor dd I sleep around.
I didn't, so don't you dare compare me with sluts.

2008-12-09T13:04:00.006+08:00

I think you are the only loser I came across in my Life.

You want to rot my name?

You are good for spoiling names.

Well, go ahead.

Fcuk off bitch

2008-12-09T12:32:00.004+08:00

Successfully constipated:D

Izah love Mummy many.Aisha dearie=)Razeen and me. My thambi okkkk.

Haseena, Nabil and Nashira weird pose.

Izah. Sukainah. Aisha.

A few pictures from yst. Gotta go get ready ald. Going out. Have a good day people. Loves.

2008-12-09T12:25:00.000+08:00

And I miss someone in my life very much. It is gonna be a week since I last saw you. And I can't wait till thursday now. I miss you. Just because I am occupied with my stuffs doesn't me you are not in my mind. You are very much loved by me.

2008-12-09T12:12:00.002+08:00

Varanam Aayiram songs are awesome.
They've got the meaning and the whole movie can move a person to tears.
Well, if it doesn't move you to tears, perhaps I am sensitive.

2008-12-09T02:52:00.002+08:00

I don't know wat we actually saw in each other

But what we felt for each other was è utmost happiness

I never realised how much I love u

But I knew you loved me always, this i was sure

To this very day I remember how u embrace me with love

It’s remarkable how wonderful u make me feel

we belong together honey, u and I

That, not anyone in è world can deny

I will always love u in every way other way i can

In è days to come, è months, è years

That will remain till u see me lying on my death bed.

The poem he wrote for me. As for whether he means it, I am still not sure.

2008-12-09T02:46:00.003+08:00

I am bored.

A question just struck me, or should I say two?

Together with love comes lust or is it together with lust comes love?

Someone please enlighten me alright?

2008-12-09T02:37:00.002+08:00

A random picture taken yesterday at Granny's place with Waseema. Okay. I've got gazillion pictures to upload. That was over-exaggeration. I know. I took over 300++ pictures since last Friday[5th to 8th. Which is four days]. And I am plain lazy to sort them out. Give me some time okay? Hahaha.

2008-12-09T02:24:00.000+08:00

Varanam Aayiram

A movie not to be missed!

2008-12-08T22:48:00.001+08:00

Nothing left to say.

Nights people.

2008-12-07T23:59:00.002+08:00

Wanted to blog about what happen in the past couple of days, but lost the mood for it.

Bestie came over to Borders@Expo with his girlfriend yesterday. Sweet enough to meet me and my boyfriend up for the second break. Thanks alot, Habib, for still remembering me despite me neglecting you over the past few months.Sorry for everything. Really appreciate it. You are my best friend, and will always remain as that.

Thats all for now.Blog more tomorrow or Tuesday with more pictures to be taken tomorrow at Granny's. Nights darlings.

And to that asshole of mine, I love you.

2008-12-05T01:04:00.001+08:00

Vivo-ed today. Watch the movie Bolt. Was Nice. I liked it. Hahah. This post will be re-edited with captions and stuffs. That is all for now. And papa, your post was uber sweet. Thanks. Good night people

2008-12-05T00:17:00.001+08:00

Happy tenth month, Mohamad Shabir Bin Ibrahim Shah.

What is love?

2008-12-04T00:40:00.002+08:00

Fcuk your shit alright? You are full of shits as usual. You keep me happy, NOT. Why is that so? Despite knowing my fcuked up character, you wanted to be with me. I never forced you to wait for me, nor fake my character to get you. You get me so emotionally affected. I really hate that part of you. You are returning back to your old ways. Well, I expected this kind of attitude. You wanted me so badly. You were trying so hard in the past month. Now that you have got me back,you are back to square one. Is it even fair to me? I should have just shrugged everything aside once and for all. I told you, I never want to regret anything this time round. But, you wouldn't let me Not regret. Why do I get this feeling, that you are not at all devoted to me? Not at all sincere to me? Not at all as loving as before? Why? You get irritated with me over the slightest issue. You raise hand on me over the smallest issue. Even it's all for funnes, you don't realise it hurts alot. It's Friday tomorrow. 5th December 2008. Tenth month together. You tell me now, do you want the ten months to go down the drain? I have been trying my best to show love, at least to a certain extent in the past couple of days. Tenth month. Let me await for the day, in the slightest hope that you will bring a smile to my face without myself knowing it. Everything is fading, slowly NOT. I wonder now? Is there another one in your life right now, that I seem so invisible to you? I told you, I wanted to blog something sweet today when we were at work yesterday. But you didn't allow me to. I am sorry for everything. I just feel that the relationship isn't materialising. Can you do something about it? Like real soon? I am not toying with your feelings now. It seems like you are instead. You are so focused in everything that is surrounding you, except me. Even a short handwritten note would simple bring a smile to my face. But you don't try. All you say is you don't get the time to do anything. But you would have all the time in the world to watch your shit dramas. Even your reasons aren't valid. Everything changes over time. You, your love.. Everything. Now can anyone tell me, what is LOVE actually? You couldn't answer me when I asked you this question just now. Now I want to know. What is love? Can someone tell me? I am shagged. Extremely. Not just physically. But mentally and emotionally as well. You always leave me gasping for air.

23 hours 20 mins left.

2008-12-03T22:18:00.001+08:00

Went to work today. Got up at 5.30am intending to go over to Shabir house to wake him up. Fortunately or unfortunately, he was awake by the time i finished showering. We were very early for work indeed. Training at Parkway Parade BORDERS wasn't as tedious as I expected it to be. But I was really shagged by the end of the day. Would be working all the way from Friday to Tuesday.

Friday- 9am - 6pm

Saturday- 9m to 10pm

Sunday- 9m to 10pm

Monday- 9m to 10pm

Tuesday- 9 am to 3pm

Please take note that my work would be at EXPO. Which is like the other end of Singapore. Mind it, I must report to work at 8.30am. I am so gonna die.

Yesterday was alright. Went to watch Four Christmases at Sun Plaza. Believe it anot, we wee the only ones in the theatre yesterday. Camwhored like shit in the theatre. The movie wasn't really as humorous as I expected it to be. It was Ok only. Might be watching the movie Bolt tomorrow. But ain't sure yeah. Gonna go down to a couple of agencies to apply for job. Wish me all the best for a long and tiring week ahead of me people. Nights people.

And my advance birthday wishes to...

IKA.

Happy Advance Birthday darling...

2008-12-03T00:00:00.000+08:00

Working tomorrow. Gotta be at Parkway Parade at 8.30am. Darn. Will blog more tmr.

Nights people.

2008-12-02T23:13:00.002+08:00

Fcuk life.

I really am regretting my life this very moment.

You get offended over the slightest with me.

You weren't like that.

Why is that so?

You don't treasure anymore.

Why do i feel it that way?

2008-12-02T13:27:00.001+08:00

Sun Plaza here I come.
Arrrrgh.

2008-12-02T13:01:00.001+08:00

Cousins love.

Taken on Sunday. Much loves.

2008-12-02T00:54:00.001+08:00

Tired and am gonna doze off any moment soon.

Gonna catch four Chrismases with Shabir tomorrow.

That is about it.

Nights people.

2008-12-01T18:55:00.003+08:00

As lonely it is.

What's love without the fights we have.
If I know what's the meaning of love, it's because of him.

Ramizah Banu Binte Abdul Rahman.

Awesome day. Lunch-ed with Shabir and his family. Loved the day.

2008-12-01T00:29:00.001+08:00

Izah and her Candyfloss love.

Let's gay awhile. Wee hoo.

My new bf=) haha. Farid boy.

Izah. Waseema. Farhanna.

In the midst of waiting for the asses. haha

Haseena with her pink extensions. Haha.

Me after my extensions. Lol. But can't be seen in the pics:(

The tudung girl with her pink+purple extensions.

Blury pics taken by me. hahaha

Credits to Noor Haseena Fatimah.

Our favourite Ice-cream.

Vivo-ed after leaving cousins.

I am very much self obssessed with myself.

I look like somescrewed up asshole here. But he looks nice.

Caramel Frapp. Muahhhs.

Never Judge a book by its cover.

Head on.

Will you lend me your shoulders whenever I need them?

The one who never fails to make me smile and cry everyday. Haha.

Very much in love with you, Shabir.

2008-11-30T22:04:00.000+08:00

Not gonna blog.
Nights people.

2008-11-30T01:05:00.001+08:00

A few pictures taken in the past couple of days. Pictures are blurred because I chose a shittified resolution. Went to watch quarantine with baby today. A total waste of money and time. I swear. The movie isn't worth anything. And yeah, I got a new phone yesterday. Yeshh! Baby was sweet enough to let me open a line under his name. Got myself the LG Viewty phone. Cool right. I like. Outting with Haseena and Waseema tmr. That's all for today. Nights people.

2008-11-29T23:55:00.000+08:00

Back home.
Will blog soon.
Boos!

2008-11-28T14:40:00.000+08:00

I have been very happy for the past couple of days. I have been going out of the boring Bukit Batok to explore other places. Yesterday, I went to Tanjong Pagar with the Kuku to apply for a temporary job. 5 days job actually, at Expo. From the 5th to the 9th December. Thn headed to Bugis to shop a little. Got the tops I have been eyeing for him and myself like finally. Had LJS for lunch and headed to Vivo City after that. At around 3 plus. Bought movie tickets for Madagascar 2. Movie was at 4.45pm. So went to skypark awhile and chilled. 15 minutes before the movie started, went to Minitoons to get MARSHMALLOWS. The movie was awesome. Fcuking funnaye. After the movie ended, went to the damn skypark again, only to kick my phone into the pool. FCUK. I was fcuking hopping here and there, and din realise my phone was on the path. Sad siak. But now my phone is working perfectly fine. But, I have got this fcuking feeling that it will get screwed again. You know water? metal? Corrodes? Fcuk it. Btw, Good morning people.

2008-11-28T00:20:00.004+08:00

I don't want to blog anything okay.

My phone droped into the water today.

You know the skypark at Vivo City?

Yeah, that place.

Baby, thanks for the awesome day today.

I love you, my boy.

2008-11-26T21:22:00.002+08:00

Back together with him again. I know I look like an ass in the picture above. Boy, make sure you'd never cheat me behind my back. Make sure you are not like what some asses think you are. That's all for today I guess. Take care people=)

2008-11-26T21:17:00.001+08:00

Dear (the last person who left a comment on your blog).I don't really know how to tell you this, but ___1___.I think I realized it when ___2______3___ and I saw you ___4___ ___5___. I'm sure you're ___6___ enough to understand ___7___. I'm returning ___8___ to you, but I'll keep ___9___ as a memory. You should also know that I ___10___ ___11___.___12___.

Loves;-Your name-P/S: You are so lifeless, ___13___, -The name of the person that tagged you-.

1. What's the color of your shirt?
Blue - Our romance is over
Red - Our affair is over
White - I'll join the monastery
Black - I dislike you
Green - Our horoscope doesn't match
Grey - You're a pervert
Yellow - I'm selling myself
Pink - Your nostrils are insulting
Brown - The mafia wants you
No shirt - You're a loser
Other - I'm in love with your sister.

Which is your birth month?
January - That night
February - Last year
March - When your dwarf bit me
April - When I tripped on sesame seeds
May - First of May
June - When you put cuffs on me
July - When I threw upAugust -
When I saw the shrunken head
September - When we skinny dipped
October - When I quoted Santa
November - When your dog ran amok
December - When I changed tennis shoes

3. Which food do you prefer?
Tacos - In your apartment
Pizza - In your camping car
Pasta - Outside of Chicago
Hamburgers - Under the bus
Salad - As you ate enchilada
Chicken - In your closet
Kebab - With Paris Hilton
Fish - In women's clothing
Sandwiches - At the Hare Krishna graduation
Lasagna - At the mental hospital
Hot dog - Under a state of trance
None of the above - With George Bush and his wife

4. What's the color of your socks?
Yellow - Hit on
Red - Ignore
Black - Insult
Blue - Knock out
Purple - Pour syrup on
White - Carve your initials into
Grey - Pull the clothes off
Brown - Put leeches on
Orange - Castrate
Pink - Pull the toupee off
Barefoot - Sit on
Other - Drive out

5. What's the color of your underwear?
Black - My best friend
White - My father
Grey - Bill Clinton
Brown - My fart balloon
Purple - My mustard souffle
Red - Donald Duck
Blue - My avocado plant
Yellow - My pen pal
Orange - My Kid Rock-collection
Pink - Manchester United's goalkeeper
None - My John F. Kennedy-statue
Other - The crazy monk

6. What do you prefer to watch on TV?
Scrubs - Man
Gossip Girls - Emotional
One Tree Hill - Open
Heroes - Frostbitten
Lost - Scarred
Simpsons - Cowardly
The news - Mongolic
American Idol - Masochistic
Family Guy - Senile
Top Model - Middle-class
None of the above - Ashamed

7. Your mood right now?
Happy - How awful I've felt
Sad - That Santa doesn’t exist
Bored - How boring you are
Angry - That your pimples are at the last stage
Depressed - That we're cousins
Excited - That there is no solution to this
Nervous - The middle-east
Worried - That your Honda sucks
Apathetic - That I did a sex-change
Ashamed - That I'm allergic to your hamster
Cuddly - That I get turned on by garbage men
Overjoyed - That I'm open
Other - That Extreme Home Makeover sucks

8. What's the color of your walls in your bedroom?
White - Your ring
Yellow - Your love letters
Red - Your Darth Vader
Black - Your tame stone
Blue - The couch cushions
Green - The pictures from LA
Orange - Your false teeth
Brown - Your contact book
Grey - Our matching snoopy-bibs
Purple - Your old lottery coupons
Pink - The cut toenails
Other - Your memories from the military service

9. The first letter of your first name?
A/B - Your photo
C/D - The oil stocks
E/F - Your neighbour Martin
G/H - My virginity
I/J - The results of your blood-sample
K/L - Your left ear
M/N - Your suicide note
O/P - My common sense
Q/R - Your mom
S/T - Your collection of butterflies
U/V - Your criminal record
W/X - David's tricot outfits
Y/Z - Your grades from college

10. The last letter in your last name?
A/B - Always will remember
C/D - Never will forget
E/F - Always wanted to break
G/H - Never openly mocked
I/J - Always have felt dirty before
K/L - Will tell the authorities about
M/N - Told in my confession today about
O/P - Was interviewed by the Times about
Q/R - Told my psychiatrist about
S/T - Get sick when I think of
U/V - Always will try to forget
W/X - Am better off without
Y/Z - Never liked

11. What do you prefer to drink?
Water- Oprah Winfrey imitations
Beer - Senility
Soft drink - A new life as a clone
Soda - The incarnation as an eskimo
Milk - The apartment building
Wine - Cocaine abuse
Cider - A passionate interest for mice
Juice - Our friendship
Mineral water - Embarrassing rash
Hot chocolate - Eggplant-fetishism
Whisky - To ruin the second world war
Other - To hate the Boston Celtics

12. To which country would you prefer to go on a vacation?
Thailand - Warm regards
USA - Best regards
England - Good luck on your short-term leave from jail
Spain - Go and drown yourself
China - Disgusting regards
Germany - With ease
Japan - Go burn
Greece - In pain
Australia - Your everlasting enemy
Egypt - Fuck off now
France - Greetings to your frog Leonard
Other - Greetings to your freaky family

13. What is your favorite activities when hanging out with mates?
Gathering for drinks - French kisser
Foosball - Silly duck
Shopping - Ugly pig
Dulging for food -
Cranky banana
Movies - Smelly armpits
Snacks - Horny wolf
Snooker - Tiny nipples
Bowling - Sexy grandmother
Outdoor activities - Vain pot
Having a long talk - Nose plucker
Taking pictures - Dumb bitch
Other - Burn yourself

And the result:

Dear Anonymous,

I don't really know how to tell you this but our affair is over. I think I realized it when your dwarf bit me in your closet and I saw you sit on Manchester United's goalkeeper. I'm sure you're Masochistic enough to understand that we're cousins. I'm returning your old lottery coupons to you, but I'll keep your mom as a memory. You should also know that I always will try to forget the apartment building. Greetings to your freaky family.

Loves, Izah:D

P/S: You are so lifeless, Dumb bitch, Anonymous.

2008-11-26T18:45:00.002+08:00

Before meeting Nesha. The usual camwhoring moments.

Nesha and me. Reflection picture.

At the busstop near her house.

And I think she looks pretty in this pic.

Hahaha. She looks like a small girl.

Somewhere near Kaushalya's place.

The usual case of my face being cut half-way.

My closest bitch.

The favourite mouth pose.

Half-eyed Nesha. and pouted lips me.

For once, I look a little smaller thn her. Yayness.

Stone table. At least, that is what Nesha calls it.

El shaik. I think that's the spelling.

Kausalya's fone. Wees.

Introducing Kausalya. Exhaling through one hole.

Expertise. Hahah
Blurfied picture.
Blowing away.Picture perfect. I like.

I look damn adorable right. I know.

Yesterday was awesome. Time really flew fast. Thanks Nesha, for making my day. More outings alright? Kausalya, remember the maximiser? Thanks darlings. I laughed alot, after a period of time.

2008-11-25T11:38:00.001+08:00

Neshaaaaaa, here I come.
Hahaha.

2008-11-24T23:41:00.004+08:00

I was quite taken aback when I saw the message you sent me the evening after we reached home. You said that I never once given you a chance to be together. You know, I know, it is so not true. After reading the long message you sent me this morning and the message you sent me just now, thoughts of you and me being together in the near future flashed in my mind. As dramatic as it might sound to you, it really did. I am hesitating so much to get back together with you. You might wonder why? I just didn't like my lifestyle with you. It was very screwed. Without my social life, my life seemed empty. I wanna hang out with my friends like now. I wouldn't want to miss the fun just because an opposite sex is there. You claim that you trust me, but to what extent? If you do, you wouldn't be restricting me of my freedom. Yes, I do the same thing. But I have told you before, I can't ring myself to trust you because of a few reasons. I am not trying to reason out with you. But with so many things on mind, I wouldn't be happy with you. Fickled-minded, you might say. Well, I agree too. That is all for now. Nights people

2008-11-24T22:46:00.000+08:00

Pictures of Izah....

Pictures we took together today.

In the skytrain towards Terminal 2:)

The colouring he did with my help at terminal 3.

And this is mine. 100% coloured by me:D

Today was fun. Headed to Tampines in the afternoon to the Recruit Express agency to apply for job together with Shabir. Hung around Tamp for an hour so and decided to head to Changi Airport where I enjoyed myself. I treated myself to sweets for sweet treats too. yay! Lazy to blog about this already.

2008-11-24T01:46:00.002+08:00

Not in a good mood. I lost it for some reasons I can't remember now. I am just annoyed. Fcuk this shit. You are fcuking annoying, Shabir.

2008-11-23T13:43:00.000+08:00

I am awake now. Will be heading to my aunty's house in the evening. I am feeling very tired. My body is aching all over. Darn. Gonna have my lunch now. Bye!

2008-11-22T23:00:00.003+08:00

Don't friends give a peck on the cheek to each other?
I personally think it's only wrong to kiss on the lip.
Forehead and cheek is totally fine with me.
But it depends on how close I am with the friend also.
I just feel down out of a sudden.

I don't like being known as Banu.
Fcuk the name Banu.
Fcuk the world.

2008-11-22T18:41:00.000+08:00

Randomness. But sweet right?

Much loves.

Happiness

2008-11-22T17:15:00.002+08:00

2008-11-22T16:46:00.002+08:00

Day was awesome. Though my mood was dampen by his annoying character in the earlier part of the day, he made it up for it before the day ended. Initial plan was for me to go to Vivo City all on my own, but he ended up joining me. I had the utmost fun yesterday. Splashing into the water with out feet made me want to go back to my childhood days. Never would I wanna deprive my children from this kind of little fun. I had mine when I was younger. Making plans for Christmas and New Year was the main thing on our minds. SHOPPING WAS THE NEXT THING ON MY MIND AFTER THAT. I realise, I have got many desires within myself. Not needs, but wants. Well, which girl wouldn't wanna pamper herself every now and then? I had the most awesome Ice cream yesterday. WOO. It was so rich, that I couldn't stop wanting for more. We took a gazillion pictures yesterday. I will posting them up in the next post, not everything though. That is all for now.

And before I end this post, let me wish....

Happy 18th Birthday Jasmin=)

2008-11-20T23:34:00.003+08:00

Weehoo. Im feeling hyper. Like really. I want to dance under the rain.

I gave Chandini "big big" kiss today.
Ummmuuuaah

2008-11-20T16:28:00.004+08:00

And for your infomation people, This is my frigging blog. I've got every rights to voice up my personal opinions. If I rarly find pure Malays pretty it's up to me, right? You can't blame me for that. If you find Indian Muslims ugly, I wouldn't blame you either. It's up to every individual for what they think. If you dun like what i blog, just shoo away from my blog. Noone wants you to read either. Dang!

2008-11-20T16:07:00.003+08:00

And i got my dress as promised.

Next week out with Waseema and Haseena I guess.

I owe Waseema a treat for doing well in her PSLE.

Nesha, it's time you thought about your future.

Just remember what I told you yesterday.

Ghazali, please get your damn ass at home.

You are not aware of the shits happening here.

Shabir, I know you are still waiting.

But I am still not ready for a relationship.

People, I know this post is very random.

I am just confused over a few stuffs.

2008-11-20T15:16:00.001+08:00

I am pissed at the moment.
Some personal matters.
Unreasonable people.
Getting out of hand.

2008-11-20T01:39:00.003+08:00

I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.I deleted friendster all over again.

I found it too boring.!

Shabir, smile now.(:

2008-11-20T00:27:00.000+08:00

Pictures taken during work yesterday. The job was pretty easy. Stocktaking:) I'm pretty lazy to elaborate everything now. Will do it when I am in the mood. I haven slept since my work ended, at 10.30am that is. That is all for now. Nights people.

2008-11-19T20:25:00.006+08:00

1)Each player of this game starts off with 10 weird things/habits/little known facts about yourself.
2)People who get tagged need to write a blog of their own 10 weird things/habits/little know facts as well as state this rule clearly.
3)At the end, you need to choose 10 people to be tagged & list their names
4)No tag back.

Tagged by: Faalah

1. I hate going to public toilet to do my business. Be it small or big. Yucks!
2. I only owe one skirt. Like wth?
3. I am falling in love with the colour Red.
4. I was never a consistent blogger. I started blogging at the age of 14 I think.
5. I find friendster boring.
6. I like homosexuals. Hahah. Don't worry, I am straight.
7. My legs are ugly because they are really black.
8. My bed sheet colour is Maroon. I like it.
9. I am very random at random times.
10. I rarely find Pure Malays pretty. Not tryna be racist here.But yeah, it's my personal opinion! [Edited]

People's who've been tagged:
Shabir
Chandini
Tina
Ganga
Ria

PS: Post edited due to some misunderstandings.

2008-11-18T18:36:00.003+08:00

Pictures taken months back. I am annoyed at the moment.
Darn

2008-11-18T18:33:00.002+08:00

I don't want anyone to interfere in my personal life.
It's my life and only my parents and my brothers have say over it.
I pity my cousin Haseena.
Screw all of them up.

2008-11-18T18:00:00.003+08:00

After months, last night I had a phone conversation with Nesha like for almost 3 hours plus. Reminiscing the times we had during the year end in 2007. Absolute funness. I miss those times with her. Those times will never return, I know. She is one of the few close friends I am left with. Love you babe. Stop crying all the time and be happy=)

Slept at 3.30 last night and woke up at 4 today. I have got work at night today. From 11.30pm to 9.30am. Stock taking at carrefour. Most probably I wouldn't be going to school tomorrow as well. Not really in the mood to blog now. Take care people. Bye!

2008-11-17T21:11:00.003+08:00

A few pictures taken today. Felicia's birthday today. Happy birthday babe. Those pictures will be up when I recieve them.

2008-11-17T13:30:00.008+08:00

500th Post.

I wanted to rant down the stuffs I have been keeping withing myself. But on second thoughts, I refrained from doing so. Or maybe I would. It contradicts alot. I will just continue with the post.

I have been living in pain in the past month or so. Not just mental suffering but physically also. It's just so unbearable. I want to run away and vanish from all. But it isn't possible, is it. I need someone whom I can talk to. Someone who will be able to guide me in a proper way in making a wise decision. I wonder if there is such a person out there., to listen to all the shits I've got to say. I have been storing my tears inside me. I wonder when am I going to break down. It's going to be obscene. I don't want that to happen. I just can't seem to cry now. I am so emotionally affected, but I can't show it out. I want to be happy. Not just on the outside, but within myself as well. It's not fun, putting up a fake front. Not only deceiving others, but myself also. I ask myself, "Is this necessary?" My heart is still wondering.

I never deprived him of the love he deserved. Not involving intimacy or what. It was just like I treated him like a small boy. We had lots of fun during the time when he wasn't so involved in his work. He became totally numb towards me. I couldn't feel the love. He blamed his work. Saying that he is so used to sitting down and getting chided from customers. I couldn't accept the reason. Yeah, I agree I wasn't as loving as you in the beginning. But you were right? I despise the feeling of being deprived of the love I very much deserve. How do you feel now? When I turn totally against you? It hurts right? This is how I felt. You only realise the value of me and my love, when I was leaving you. When I totally gave up on you. Why is that so? Can you answer this questions? All you say is I realise my mistake and I will change. I had enough with that dialogue.

I lost my cousin. Not as if she is dead or whatsoever. But lost. Sometimes I think, guys are just a bunch of useless shits. But girls cannot live without guys. Guys can't live without girls either. Not just for intimacy sake. Okay, let me get back to what I was saying. I am sure I did mention about giving up my cousins, for my past, Shabir. It was a stupid move. But I had to choose only one party. I regretted my decision. Notice the -ed in the previous sentence. I don't regret it now. This is my blog and I have all the rights to post anything I want. I fcuking hell know that you read my blog. Your boyfriend ~~was~~/is a coward. All words but no actions. You said you were disgusted by my character. Frankly speaking, I think you have a more disgusting character. I trusted you and told you some stuffs. And you went to tell him, when he wasn't even your boyfriend then. And he went to tell stuffs to his brothers and got me into trouble. I should have never trusted you. I don't feel guilty at all for asking him the stuffs you told me. I swear. Any girl in my situation would have asked no matter what. Only a dumbfcuk wouldn't bother if you told her something serious and expect her not to confront her boyfriend or the one she love/d dearly. Especially when you come and tell me that your boyfriend said that, Shabir loved his past more then me. That is fcuking ridiculous. Being with him for nine months I know who he loved the most. Your dumb boyfriend assumed everything and talked shit. He should have just bothered about his relationship instead. The non-stop messages from your boyfriend during the 3-4 days. Was quite a torment. There's a limit to every shit. Darn

I am craving for ice cream at the moment. Swensen's please. I can't wait till my pay is in. I have got thousand and one stuffs to purchase. Hair extensions are one of them. With my cousin Haseena. She wants loud colours and I am still deciding. Shabir still owes me a baby doll dress which I have been eyeing for. I want to treat myself to manicure and pedicure. I want to rebond my fringe. It is getting out of hand. Darn. But I don't have money. Anyone want to sponsor me money to rebond my whole hair? Pretty please:) I would be the happiest person on earth. I swear. I want to get a new bag. I need to get black skinnies. I need to replenish my make up set, though I don't wear much. I want to strike jackpot can? I want a new pair of heels. And not forgetting the pair of contacts which Shabir has been owing me. I am a girl with billion desires.

I want to dance. I dislike girls wearing layered mini skirts. It makes them look like sluts. I killed a lizard in my toilet a couple of weeks back together with my brother. I like Krishh and Michael. They are celebrities by the way. I am falling in love with the colour brown all over again. I like eating ice cream under the rain. I am very black, but my legs are blacker. I am getting hotter. My nail polish is wearing off. I love tweety. I can't sing but I have attempted to sing. It was a disaster. I miss my Millennia life. I bought waffer with apple fillings today. And it tasted aweful. I am listening to the song "Apologise" now. I love my cream coloured skinnies. Bye!

2008-11-17T09:30:00.001+08:00

In class at the moment. Picture above was taken some time back. Woke up early morning, to see 7 messages from him. I owe you an apology for treating you so bad. Not that I want you to fcuk off from my life, but just that I want a space of my own for the time being. I want my own circle of friends. I lost almost everyone during this relationship. I dowan my life to be only consisting of you. I need a break from everything. That is all for now.

2008-11-17T00:52:00.000+08:00

Hahahah. Sweetness.

Nights people.

2008-11-17T00:22:00.000+08:00

The love of secondary school life. The bestest class of all.
Much loves.

2008-11-16T23:21:00.004+08:00

Went over to Big mother's place today. Was kinda fun. Had fun with the crazy cousins. Haseena din want her pictures to be taken whereas Waseema din want her pics to be blogged. The blue leopard girl. Saathique anne fume in anger today. First time in my life. Haha. But all are loved. Met Shabir under my block after that for about 45 minutes as he wanted to see. Just crapped about some random stuffs and we left. And friendster is alright now. But I had to add up my friends all over again. Darn. Screw Friendster alright. Maybe I sould just create a facebook account instead. More exciting. Thats about it for now. And yeah, I will be going to school tmr. Ika, I miss you! Randomness.

2008-11-16T15:37:00.003+08:00

The host of Coffee with Anu. I think she looks good and she is very witty.

2008-11-16T15:15:00.001+08:00

Will be going to aunty's place later.

I think my father is cute.

Hahaha

2008-11-16T00:39:00.002+08:00

At my house.

Pitiful face. Adorable seyy.
While Nesha was blabbing away. LOVES.

I don't think I will stop blogging. Hahaha. Met Nesha at around 5.45pm today. Slacked with her till around 9.20pm. Loves.

2008-11-15T22:42:00.002+08:00

I wish I am dead.
Not being dramatic or what.
But I am sick and tired of life.

PS: This might be the last post I am posting. I dowanna blog anymore.

2008-11-15T15:02:00.002+08:00

Taken in my granny's room when I stayed there a few days back.

Loves

2008-11-15T13:26:00.002+08:00

Darn! Having terrible+horrible flu. Nesha will be cmg under my block at around 3 plus. She needs to update me on some stuffs. Will be seeing her. Thn got Deelah's nephew birthady partaye at night. I doubt if i will be going thou. Sorry if i don't make it Deelah. Loves. tats all for now. Tata

2008-11-15T02:02:00.000+08:00

Happy 21st Anniversary darlings. Without y'all I am nowhere in the world.

Much loves.

2008-11-15T00:00:00.002+08:00

At City hall

A shot with him
And another with him also.
Camwhore.

Reflections. Fave
Last night
The "hot" look. LMAO
Couple of days back I think. Highness.

Pictures for now.

2008-11-14T23:34:00.001+08:00

Just had a talk with mother.

Told her the issue I am having with Hanisah.

Told her everything.

That's all.

Bye

2008-11-14T22:30:00.004+08:00

Just as I thought I had made a clear decision, here I am having mixed feelings all over again. Is this the problem of being such a fickled-minded person. I feel like a fcuktard now. I am not only playing with my feelings but his as well. Can I just forget the past months I had? Almost a year. I am struggling each day. How I wish I disappear suddenly and never return or maybe consider that he never existed? I am not being practical, I know. Darn. Everything seems to be swirling. Please give me a piece of mind. And she gets lost in her train of thoughts all over again. Fret not, she's alright people.

2008-11-14T21:28:00.002+08:00

Back home. A tiring day, it has been. City hall-ed, Tekka-ed, Town-ed. With Mr Shabir. Went to City Hall to apply for some job. Thn got hungry and I was craving for Indian food, so went to Tekka. Makan till very full. LOVES. Thn headed to Orchard to get Mom Bobbi Brown Powder. Walked around a while and came back. Lazy to blog. Quite chilled now. Friendster is under maintainence. Oh gooooody. Thats all. Bye.

2008-11-14T12:22:00.002+08:00

Hahaha. Shabir damn funny. I told him tat Jabeer messaged me on friendster regarding re-union. Haha. And Shabir was like I will need you on that day. I will be crying. You said that you will be there for me whenever I needed you. And I was like "SHABIR!" And he immediately said "Stop scolding me for another guy." Wtf. haha. I just said Shabir and he said I was scolding. LMAO. Btw, I am not sure when will the meet up be people. I forwarded the mail to Katha. If she responses it's on. If not, gone. I don't have contact with Anesah and Supriya already. And, and I can't log in into friendster.

ERROR

The requested URL could not be retrieved

While trying to retrieve the URL: http://friendster.com/

The following error was encountered:

Access Denied.

Access control configuration prevents your request from being allowed at this time. Please contact your service provider if you feel this is incorrect.

Your cache administrator is webmaster.

Generated Fri, 14 Nov 2008 04:14:28 GMT by squidcache2.gbxsc.friendster.com (squid/2.6.STABLE9)

Somebody help me!

How do I go about this?

Tag me if you know. Thanks darlings.

2008-11-14T01:11:00.004+08:00

Shabir, you are the bestest of best in my life.
You will be the best friend from this day.
I won't give you up for anyone.
I assure you this.

PS: It may sound stupid to people out there. But he's someone who knows everything about me. I wouldn't want to lose someone like him in my life. Relationship did not materialise. Hopefully this friendship blooms. Nights people.

2008-11-13T23:53:00.001+08:00

Thanks Chandini.
You are loved many.

2008-11-13T23:10:00.002+08:00

I realise now, you weren't worth my time at all.

You made use of me, of my love and everything I had for you.

You cheated my feelings big time.

You call me desperate cause my friend wanted to get in contact with me.

I was nice enough to not be bothered about him for the time being.

Just because I sided him for a trivial matter, you called m a despo.

I wonder now.

What do you actually know about me in the past 9 months.

Nothing I say.

You are selfish.

You can't move on, so you stop me from moving on.

In which way is this actually fair?

I regret my life now.

Goodbye people.

Take care.

2008-11-13T22:51:00.001+08:00

You irritate the hell outta me.

Darn.

Fcuk you, cb!

2008-11-13T14:29:00.002+08:00

Awesome yesterday which I wish to forget.

PS:I wouldn't be able to reply to any messages or answer any calls people, PP low. Don't think I am ignorant.

P/ps: Izah is hot. She is a little cranky right now.

2008-11-12T16:39:00.002+08:00

Was talking to Nesha moments ago.

Like for about an hour.

We with our random life stories.

Love you babe=)

2008-11-12T16:00:00.000+08:00

Running out of words to say...

2008-11-12T12:57:00.001+08:00

Woke up to Jasmin's message today. Karthik msged Jasmin saying that he lost contact with me and wanted my number. Karthik isn't some random guy on the streets or what. I've know him since 7. Same Primary School+same Seconday School. 12 years friendship. Lost contact with him at around April this year. Haha. Haven reply to Jasmin yet. Because I wanted Someone to know that I am going to give my number to a friend. I dowan a probllem even though we aren't together or what. He just called me and asked me why I wanted to pass. Haha. I just say friends only what. He was just a friend. I swear. Believe it! Have a great day people.

2008-11-12T00:18:00.002+08:00

Pictures taken today=) IMM-ed with Shabir.

2008-11-11T23:23:00.001+08:00

Back home.

Talking to Nesha now.

Blog later.

2008-11-11T15:07:00.001+08:00

Craving for LJS now.
Anyone wanna accompany me??
I hate going alone siak.
Bleaukks.

2008-11-11T01:12:00.001+08:00

Nights people.